not-cheese steaks

I (Katie) lived in Philadelphia for 6 years and never once ate a Philly cheese steak. Yeah, I was vegetarian the whole time. I ate plenty of fake cheese steaks with soy protein. When eating fake meat, it's best not to try to compare it to the real thing. You will always, always be disappointed if you do. If you approach it with no preconceptions, you might just find something totally new and totally delicious. That said, if you are ever in Philly, you should get a fake chicken cheese steak from Govinda's. They're amazing!

We had some packages of Yves ground in the fridge that needed to get eaten and we were planning on making a faux-bolognese with them. But I mentioned to Kenny that I was craving a cheese steak, so he decided we would make cheese steaks instead.

This isn't a traditional Philly cheese steak by any means. Having grown up in PA, I (Kenny) am a Philly steak purist, and have a hard time with Californians adding mayo, mustard, lettuce, tomato, and raw onions to my sandwich; it's not that its a bad sandwich, just don't call it a Philly cheese steak. Just give me the basics: meat, cheese, and sauteed onions on an Amoroso roll. Sometimes when I am feeling frisky, I like some pizza sauce on there. A Pizzacheesewhiff, if you will. Oh, and like 6 hot peppers from the condiment table. Anyway...

We decided to add some collards into the mix so that we could get some green in there, and come to think of it, it would be a great way to sneak some in on your kids, if you have them.

Ingredients:
1 bunch collard greens, roughly chopped
1 small yellow onion, sliced
1 small red onion, sliced
2 packages Yves ground
1 cup pasta sauce
8 slices mozzarella cheese
4 rolls
6 to 8 pepperoncini, roughly chopped, stems removed (unless you like chewing on stems, that is)
salt, pepper to taste
red pepper flakes, garlic powder optional

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees. Slice open your rolls and give them a good fold so that they will stay open and flat when you put them on the cookie sheet. Top them with 2 slices of cheese (we used mozzarella), and pop them in the oven for 7 to 8 minutes until the cheese is melty and delicious.

Saute the onions until translucent 6 to 8 minutes on medium heat. Toss in your collard greens and cook for an additional 4 or 5 minutes. Add in the fake ground and a pinch each of garlic powder and red pepper flakes. After the "meat" is nice and hot, stir in the pasta sauce and warm through. Add the pepperoncini and a little salt and pepper to taste. Toss it on the roll and grab some napkins, these sandwiches are pretty big, and just as messy as they are tasty.